tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41876391941599466802024-03-13T17:15:15.900-06:00Get Well Soon KaitlinCarolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.comBlogger68125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-39163325249717599102017-09-11T22:26:00.001-06:002017-09-11T22:26:58.775-06:00Inside Out<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i>As I was writing this post, I realized that it gives the impression that the main staples of my life are sorrows and trouble. This is not the case. I have had so many things in the past years that have been beautiful, normal, and enjoyable. </i><i>Most days I feel blessed beyond measure.</i></div>
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<i>I </i><i>have found however, that writing helps me process through the difficulty and ambiguity of life. It is cathartic. It helps me stay grounded. It leads me to truth. I hope it does the same for you. </i></div>
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<b>If you haven’t seen
the movie Inside Out, go watch it now.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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I mean it…<o:p></o:p></div>
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Go watch it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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It literally changed
my life.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I can almost bet that those of you who HAVE watched it know
exactly what I’m talking about. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The relationship between sadness, and joy, and jealously,
and anger is absolutely stunning. <o:p></o:p></div>
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As they pass and life happens, happy memories become touched
by sadness or anger or jealousy.
Different life events come into the picture, and as much as we wish
those memories could remain untouched…just as they were the happy day that they
were made…that’s not how it works…at least not for me. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Those of you who have read this blog might look at what I’m
about to write and say that it looks like I’m moving backwards or not making
any progress in processing my injury. Maybe that’s true. Maybe that’s bad.
Maybe that’s good…or maybe I’m just moving deeper. <o:p></o:p></div>
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“I’ve got a new
normal”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Look what I CAN do!”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“I’m learning to
balance the sadness with joy and hope”<o:p></o:p></div>
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These statements that I’ve made in the past are still true.
But I was talking with a friend the other day and she made the point that to
ignore the emotion that is still there…still behind the events and changes and
joys and challenges that I face every day BECAUSE of the accident…that’s doing
an injustice to something that is STILL part of my life. Something that is
STILL meant to be dealt with and learned from.
Something that is STILL hard. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Yes, it has been four years…but that doesn’t mean that I
have to have moved past all of the hardship and be “over it”.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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Carolyn asked me on a beach in Cape Cod about 3 years ago
whether or not being on a beach again (but in a wheelchair) made me in some way
sad. Whether it took some of the
memories I had of being on the beach as a kid or with John…swimming…feeling the
power of the waves…did it take those memories and taint them in some way. I said no. It truly didn’t at that time. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Now, I’d say yes.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
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This is a journey. It
still changes. It still has its ups and
downs. And honestly, it STILL affects almost every part of my life every single
day. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I remember how easy it was to hop out of bed to grab a water
bottle if I forgot it. I smile when I think about babysitting triplet two year
olds and chasing them around in chaos. I
have happy memories of flirting with my husband in our kitchen and backyard.
And when I think about these things, sometimes they begin to feel sad. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I remember how it feels to hike. Oh goodness, how I miss it.
Sometimes so much that I can’t breathe. How much do I wish that those joyous
memories of hiking and being free and breathing rhythmically with my steps and
seeing nature…how much do I wish they would be untouched…just stay happy. But they won’t. <o:p></o:p></div>
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My ascent to the top of Long’s Peak with friends...</div>
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beautiful,
momentous, tough, SAD, ANGRY, JEALOUS.<o:p></o:p></div>
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My daily walks up the trail besides the Flatirons in
college…</div>
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peaceful, quiet, centering, SAD, ANGRY, JEALOUS.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Chasing a two year old through the grass and snatching them
up into a hug…</div>
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giggly, joyful, SAD, ANGRY, JEALOUS.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Sadness</b> that I can no
longer experience these things in the same way that I used to.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Anger</b> in feeling like
something beautiful has been snatched from me, and I have no way to get it back<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Jealousy</b> over those
who are still able to enjoy these things the way I once did<o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
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Tears stream down my face as I let myself think about these
moments. In a way, it feels like I have
lost a friend. <o:p></o:p></div>
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It almost gets harder the more time passes after you’ve lost
a loved one. You realize that they’re actually
gone. You grasp the devastating permanence of the fact that you will never see
or talk to that person EVER. AGAIN. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Ever.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Again.<o:p></o:p></div>
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They’re gone. My legs are gone. My friends that have lived
so much of life with me…experienced so much joy with me. Made so many memories
with me…they’re gone. I miss them. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
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<b>I’m four years out, and many times it’s harder now than it
has ever been. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b>It is devastating because it is permanent. And I see the
permanence more and more every day. </b><o:p></o:p></div>
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I put a band aid on it saying “but I CAN do this” or “you
can do whatever any able bodied person can do if you put your mind to it”. Yes, I can. But does that take away the
memories I had before this new life? Does it permanently cement them in a
different world that is somehow separate from the one I am living in now?
Absolutely not. The two are so mixed and convoluted. Sometimes I wish it was
more simple. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I am a different person than I was before I got hurt, so my
perspective on the way that I lived my life before the injury has been impacted
so dramatically. Paralyzed Kaitlin
judges walking Kaitlin…”why didn’t you do those things while you could?”. If I
were all of a sudden able to walk now, I would do so many things that I never
would have dreamed of doing in my life before the injury. But now that option is gone. Walking Kaitlin
never even knew she wanted those options until the chance to take them was
gone. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I don’t even know what this blog is about anymore. So many
ideas that have been swirling around in my head for so long...<o:p></o:p></div>
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I guess the theme is
that I am paralyzed…that is permanent.</div>
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In the wake of that, both
my past and my future are affected in a devastating way.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And sometimes you
can’t just slap a cheesy “you can do it” statement on that…because even though
you CAN do it…”doing it” is no longer the same. You’ve got to feel the weight
of that change and loss and realize that the change and loss doesn’t just get
processed and then go away…it sticks with you, and it might even get harder
with time.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I am being transformed
and molded through this journey, and sometimes a shift as dramatic as this one
makes you confused about everything that you were and everything that you did
before the opportunities for your life were diminished and changed beyond
recognition…<o:p></o:p></div>
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But in this I have to
remember what doesn’t change. How is
paralyzed Kaitlin the same as walking Kaitlin?<o:p></o:p></div>
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This new person still
has the same purpose. To make disciples for the glory of God and the joy of all
people.<o:p></o:p></div>
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That remains true.
That is a foundation. That is not a band aid.<o:p></o:p></div>
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This journey is
tough…and it’s ongoing. You think you’ve
got one thing processed and now you’re good…it’s all figured out…until it’s
not.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
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<b>Praise God for His
consistency in this ever shifting life.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-37577657548108550482016-04-18T22:05:00.000-06:002016-04-18T22:05:15.668-06:00"But God..." -- A Post From Sue<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Dear friends and family,</div>
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It seems like ages since I’ve written on the <span class="il">blog</span>! I guess in some ways that’s very good, perhaps indicating that we’re all busy and moving forward with our lives. In other ways, however, I feel badly to be somewhat ‘disconnected’ from many of you who have been such faithful supporters and prayer warriors for all of us during the past 2 1/2 years.</div>
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Kaitlin actually encouraged me to write this <span class="il">blog</span> while we were on a recent Spring break trip to Florida where we visited my dear mother, Becky, and my Florida siblings. While traveling together we had many great conversations and she suggested that I post a <span class="il">blog</span>.</div>
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We are all doing well. And we thank God for His many blessings over the past few years. Thank you for your prayers and sincere inquiries regarding Kaitlin and John. We are encouraged by your love and your sincere interest in their progress. In fact, Kaitlin and I were talking about our varied replies when we are frequently asked, “How is everyone doing?” I was telling her about a recent Bible study I attended with my close girlfriends where we were discussing a chapter from Dan Stone’s book titled, “The Rest of the Gospel” and how greatly it impacted my personal response to that very question. When asked about Kaitlin, I would typically say something like, “God has been faithful and blessed us in many ways, but she hasn’t had feeling or movement return below her injury sight.” At the Bible study we discussed another way to ‘frame up’ the exact same response. I’ve begun calling it my “… but God..” statement. The same words are spoken, yet an entirely different message is conveyed: “Kaitlin hasn’t had feeling or movement return below her injury sight, but God is faithful and He has blessed us in so many other ways.” Can you hear the difference? Do you sense the hope and thankful heart in my second response? Do you see the praise and glory given to God? It’s all related to the order in which it’s said. Kaitlin loved that concept, and she asked me to share it with you! I challenge you, therefore, to try to personally incorporate “…but God..” statements into your life everyday. I have, and they have helped me to become more positive and to serve as a reminder that God is indeed faithful to us in so very many ways.</div>
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That being said, I would like to ask for very specific prayer from all of you. Kaitlin was in a car accident earlier this year (which was not her fault) but the impact of the airbag explosion has greatly increased her nerve pain and muscle spasms. Nerve pain can be common in cases of paralysis. It is pain felt below the site of the injury. Even though she cannot feel gentle touch below her injury line, she can feel extensive nerve pain which she says is similar to feeling a scratching sensation over a severe sunburn. Unfortunately, experiencing nerve pain does not indicate that any nerves are actually being rejuvenated or healed. It sounds similar to ‘phantom pain’ when one loses a limb. Kaitlin’s nerve pain has become chronic and extremely painful requiring lots of daily medications. There is, however, a treatment available called a Spinal Cord Stimulator (SCS) implant. The SCS uses low voltage stimulation of the spinal nerves to block the feelings of pain. It could help her to better manage her pain and potentially decrease the amount of pain medication. Stimulation does not eliminate the source of pain, it simply interferes with the signal to the brain, and so the amount of pain relief varies for each person. The goal of the SCS is a 50% - 70% reduction in pain; however, even a small amount of pain reduction would be significant if it helped her to perform daily activities with less pain and reduced the amount of medication she needed to take.</div>
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Before a permanent stimulator can be implanted, the patient must undergo a trial to see IF the device decreases their level of pain. The surgery is performed on an out patient basis in two stages: Stage 1 is the trial stimulation and Stage 2 is implantation of the permanent device. The trial stimulation is very important to determine if the procedure will be successful. It will tell if stimulation is correct for the type, location, and severity of her pain. Kaitlin has her first appointment with a doctor on <span class="aBn" data-term="goog_308999110" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(204, 204, 204); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; position: relative; top: -2px; z-index: 0;" tabindex="0"><span class="aQJ" style="position: relative; top: 2px; z-index: -1;">Thursday, April 21st</span></span>, to learn more about the SCS and to perhaps move forward as a candidate for the implant. We would very much appreciate your prayers regarding this medical decision. Please join me in praying for:</div>
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<i>God’s wisdom and blessing in moving forward with this procedure.</i></div>
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<i>Pray that Kaitlin would be a candidate for the implant.</i></div>
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<i>Pray for a great response and decrease in pain. I am boldly praying for a 100% decrease in nerve pain!</i></div>
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As always, we appreciate your prayers and we believe God answers them! Thank you for taking part in our journey. We love you all!</div>
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Sue</div>
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Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-68408784839730713222015-10-27T12:07:00.001-06:002015-10-27T12:07:44.463-06:00I'm Afraid of Zombies<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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John and I started
watching The Walking Dead Season 1.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>About three episodes in, I decided that we should stop.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I was afraid.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
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Washing dishes alone
at the sink at night, I was sure that something terrifying and startling was
about to happen…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the shower, I was
convinced that I would open the curtain to see some stranger standing there.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The same thing
happened with Criminal Minds…and I’m even struggling slightly with Cluny the
Scourge in the children’s novel, <u style="text-underline: thick;">Redwall</u>
(don’t judge).<o:p></o:p></div>
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Fear is a real thing,
and lately, I have felt plagued by it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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___________________<o:p></o:p></div>
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I’m not only talking
about silly fantasy fears of the creepy man under the bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Real fears.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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What if I get a sore?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What if I hurt one of
my shoulders?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What if my work
decides they don’t want me?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What if something
happens to John?<o:p></o:p></div>
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How am I ever going
to have kids AND do all of the things I have to do to take care of my body?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What’s going to
happen to me when I get older?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What if something
ELSE goes wrong?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cancer? Another injury?
More health problems?<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Fear can be
crippling, and if I let it, it can completely wipe out any hope I have within
me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Satan loves this.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
_____________________<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Last week, I was home
sick with a stomach bug for <u style="text-underline: thick;">one day</u>. I found
by the end of the day that I had turned into a complete emotional puddle on the
couch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was pretty uncomfortable
physically, but I was MORE uncomfortable with the fact that I had failed to
care for myself throughout the day (John was home helping me), I had not gone
to work, I had not gotten anything done around the house…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Each of these things
played into one of the above fears, and soon enough, voices in my head had
started to chatter:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“You are worthless”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“You’ll never be able
to have kids…what will they do when you are sick like this?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“Your body is so
broken, why even try to take care of it?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“You’re such a
failure…you can’t even take care of your own body…imagine what it will be like
when this happens when you are older.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My mind felt like a
chapter out of The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Then come the scarier thoughts…the ones nobody wants to talk about:<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“You know, you really
don’t HAVE to deal with this anymore.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“It would be so
easy…then no more struggle”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Tears.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Frustration.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Sadness.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Fear.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
_____________________<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I’m being real with you</b>.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Real</b> is important.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Real </b>gives opportunity for the light to shine in…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Satan hates that.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But that’s just it,
friends…light.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">There is light.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p><br /></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I do not have to be crippled by fear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I have been given the tools with which to fight it. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
When Jesus died on a
cross for me and three days later rose from the dead, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he demonstrated His undeniable goodness</i> by taking the pain of my
sin upon his back, simply so that I would be able to know Him and experience
His love. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Over and over, God
promises that He will be with me in times of trouble.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
In Hosea, he declares
“I will <u style="text-underline: thick;">lead her</u> into the desert…”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God promises that he will lead us into
difficult times of life…but <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">if He is
leading us, then we know without a doubt that He is with us as we walk through
it.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Lord also
desperately desires for me to put my identity in Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background: #FAFAFA; color: #333333; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“For
all who are led by the Spirit of God are <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">children of
God</b>.” Rom 8:15</span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span>If I live as though I am a child of the
King of the Universe, then even if all of my fears come true, I have confidence
that my Father, the one who made heaven and earth still looks on me with joy…<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I still have worth because he gives it to
me.</i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
____________________<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">So here’s the question…<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if I get a sore?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if I hurt one of
my shoulders?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if my work
decides they don’t want me?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p> </o:p><span style="text-align: center;"> </span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if something
happens to John?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
How am I ever going
to have kids AND do all of the things I have to do to take care of my body?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What’s going to
happen to me when I get older?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if something
ELSE goes wrong?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cancer? Another injury?
More health problems?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God is still good. He will be with you. You are still His child.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
________________________<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Would these things be difficult if they happened?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Incredibly. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
God is in control and
He is good. But a lot of times, His good might disagree with what I think good
should look like in my life…and that may be devastatingly painful.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But we are a whisper,
and The Bible says that the trials of this life cannot compare to the glories
that are to come when we are united again with Christ. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 11.0pt;">Rom
8:18</span></i></b><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
There are plenty of
things to fear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Whether they come
from a TV show, a children’s storybook, or our own lives…fear is real. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But so is God…and He
is stronger.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="border-bottom: solid windowtext 1.5pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 1.0pt 0in;">
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<br /></div>
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I will fear no
evil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For my God is with me. And if my
God is with me, whom (what) then shall I fear? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background: #FDFEFF; color: red; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Even though I walk through the valley of the
shadow of death,</span><b><i><sup><span style="background: #FDFEFF; color: red; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://biblehub.com/esv/psalms/23.htm#footnotes" title="Or the valley of deep darkness"><span style="color: red; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">c</span></a></span></sup></i></b><span style="color: red; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br />
<span style="background: #FDFEFF;">I will fear no evil,</span><br />
<span style="background: #FDFEFF;">for you are with me;</span><br />
<span style="background: #FDFEFF;">your rod and your staff,</span><br />
<span style="background: #FDFEFF;">they comfort me.</span></span><span style="color: red; font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Psalm 23:4<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-35384127155792818762015-05-09T16:38:00.001-06:002015-05-09T16:46:28.138-06:00Room for Sadness<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
It’s that time of
year again.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The weather is
getting nice.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
People are getting
out and enjoying the sun.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As I drive home from
work, I see runners… I see bike riders…I see couples strolling and holding
hands.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As I leave the
grocery store, I see a Mom getting on her bike with one baby on the back and
one on the front.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">My response to these images for the past year and half has been, “it’s
ok, you might not be able to do that…but you can do other things!”<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But the truth is, I
desperately <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">want</i> to be able to do
these things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
When I see a Mom
pushing a stroller, or someone taking a jog…my heart aches. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I feel sad. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
My Mom has said to me
that she worries that I haven’t processed the accident enough…haven’t taken the
time to mourn like so many others have…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I’ve consistently
played it off.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
“Mom, I’m fine!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can drive. I’m back to work. I can run
errands, cook, and do laundry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a
wife, and even a mom to my puppy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
ok.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But I think she’s
right…I think there’s something more for me to recognize.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I’m not ok because I can “do” all of these things…I’m ok because Jesus
has made it so that the sadness will <u style="text-underline: thick;">someday</u>
be undone. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
We have been studying
Revelation at church…putting ourselves in the very midst of the throne-room
where God’s plan to cleanse the world is in action.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
He WILL bring all
hearts to Him, and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">He</b> is where the
beauty is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">He</b> is where the suffering ends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">He</b> is where sadness ceases.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But that’s just
it…the sadness has <u style="text-underline: thick;">not yet</u> been undone…and
that means that it is very real.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As we wait for the
Lord to take it away, He uses it as a tool in our lives.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Sadness encourages me to run to God for comfort because He is the only
one who can give it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Sadness gives Him the chance to meet me in my despair when I have
nothing else to cling to, and lead me into the hope of eternity with Him<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">For me, sadness has served to help me to identify some of my idols and
selfish desires…the things that I cling to above Christ<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I see the idol of
control in my heart when I look at my life and it just isn’t what I THOUGHT it
should look like.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I realize the root
sin of comparison in my life when I look at other women and envy their
bodies/capabilities.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I see the reality of
my stubbornness to rely on myself instead of Christ when I am bitter about
having to re-learn things in a different way.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
This is not to say
that everything we are sad about reveals an idol in our life…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I am SAD about not
being able to walk…but that does not mean I idolized walking…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">What I’m realizing is that sadness is real, and it is only as <u style="text-underline: thick;">I embrace it</u> that I see its many purposes.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I recognize the
brokenness of myself and the world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Left with nothing
else to hope in, I run to CHRIST for comfort<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
In the arms of my
loving Father, I cling to the fact that someday, this sadness WILL be undone.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">My new struggle is with the balance of allowing the sadness to be real
and to penetrate my heart, while still clinging to the hope we have in Christ
and the joy that stems from that. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I don’t know exactly
how to do that…but I do know that sadness is OK.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Sadness does not mean
that I am a failure...that I am not “strong enough”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I am not OK because I FEEL OK<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I am OK because God is in control.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><br /></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">____________</b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span></b></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-size: x-small;"><i><span class="text Rev-21-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: left;"><b>"</b></span><span class="text Rev-21-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;">Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”</span><span class="text Rev-21-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; text-align: left;"><span style="line-height: 22px;"> </span><span style="line-height: 24px;">for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away,</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31055B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31055B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> and there was no longer any sea.</span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"> </span><span class="text Rev-21-2" id="en-NIV-31056" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;">2 </span>I saw the Holy City,<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31056C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31056C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God,<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31056D" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31056D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> prepared as a bride<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31056E" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31056E" title="See cross-reference E">E</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> beautifully dressed for her husband.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"> </span><span class="text Rev-21-3" id="en-NIV-31057" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;">3 </span>And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them.<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31057F" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31057F" title="See cross-reference F">F</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31057G" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31057G" title="See cross-reference G">G</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"> </span><span class="text Rev-21-4" id="en-NIV-31058" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; text-align: left;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;">4 </span>‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes.<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31058H" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31058H" title="See cross-reference H">H</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>There will be no more death </span><span class="text Rev-21-4" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; text-align: left;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">or mourning or crying or pain,</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-31058J" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-31058J" title="See cross-reference J">J</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> for the old order of things has passed away.'" Rev 21:1-4</span></span></i></span></div>
</div>
Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-14382947884864765872014-09-14T20:55:00.001-06:002014-09-14T20:55:27.762-06:00Brave enough...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
This will be my first entry since the one-year anniversary
of my injury.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>September 1 was just a day
for John and I.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We didn’t take it too seriously
or get too emotional about it; but it has given me the chance to look back over
the past year of events and just reflect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
From the very moment of the accident, The Lord gave me a
sense of peace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As I opened my eyes in that dry riverbed, I soon came to
realize that I could not feel or move my legs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Instead of freaking out about that…I started immediately talking about
how grateful I was that I COULD feel and move my arms and hands. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
One of the first things I started talking about upon entering
the ICU was how excited I was to go to Disneyland and get fast-passes for every
ride. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Through all of my therapies, I was strong and
determined.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took the time I had at
Craig as an opportunity to meet other people and be an encourager.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many times I was even an encourager to my
friends and family.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
When people would come to visit, I wanted to make them feel
comfortable and like they didn’t have to worry about me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to be OK as to make sure that they
were ok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Overall…I was brave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
In some ways, I think the Lord gave me this bravery and
peace as a way to survive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had to push
on and do the next thing so that I could get better…so that I could get back to
normal life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Well, I’m here now…back to normal life….but my new normal is
not what I thought it would be. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Unless the Lord chooses to heal me, I will spend the rest of
my life sitting down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will never again
feel the sand in my toes or the lapping of ocean waves on my legs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I won’t summit another fourteen thousand foot
mountain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It will take me at least three
times longer to get in and out of my car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I will plan my days around how many transfers will be required of me. I
will need someone to push my cart at the grocery store.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will continue to ask people to pump my gas
at the gas station.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will fear stairs
and cracks in the sidewalks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will live
with sore shoulders and consistent pain in my hands. I will always rely on
others to reach items on high shelves, or to reach under my desk to grab that
apple that rolled away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will be
nervous to be alone for fear of falling from my chair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For the most part, everything will be just a
little bit more difficult. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
That is scary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
the question is…am I still brave?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
You know what…I think bravery at this stage of my healing
process looks different than it did in the beginning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am not brave…I am
scared.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But in a way, that is the
bravest thing I can say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It can be terrifying
to not be ok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is so hard for me to
acknowledge the fact that I cannot make everyone happy for forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People will be sad when they hear my story
and look at my life, even if I am bright and sparkling and perfectly happy. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Lord is big enough for me to
struggle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is knitting all of this
into a story of beauty, whether I’m cheery or not. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
So in this season, I’m brave enough to not be brave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s new for me, and very scary, but so
authentic. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<span style="color: red;">Psalm 62:5 “For God alone, o’ my soul wait in silence, for
my hope is from Him.”</span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-44259197029046125732014-08-05T17:19:00.000-06:002015-05-09T16:40:54.168-06:00"What is your life? For you are a mist..."<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">On June 1, one year
after our wedding day, John and I renewed our vows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To some this may sound strange.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Normally vow renewals happen 10, 20, 50 years
after a marriage…but looking back on the craziness of our first year, we felt
that repeating the promises we made to each other on the day of our wedding was
fitting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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And so, gathered in our backyard with a few close family and
friends, we re-stated our commitment to one another:<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I John take you
Kaitlin to be my lawfully wedded wife <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You are my best
friend, and it is my delight to marry you today. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to love you
steadily when things get hard, and that my commitment today will not be swayed
by future circumstances or feelings. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to laugh
with you, to cry with you, and to be faithful to you until we are parted by
death; to put your needs ahead of my own, and to treat you with tenderness and
respect. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to do my
best to love you and lead you as Jesus has done for the Church, to show you
grace as he has shown me grace, and to seek your good even though it may cause
me harm. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to allow God
to use you in my life as He grows me into a man, strong and courageous, who
walks humbly with the Lord.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And so throughout
life, no matter what may lie ahead of us, I pledge to you my life as a loving
and faithful husband.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I Kaitlin take you
John to be my lawfully wedded husband<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You are my best
friend, and it is my delight to marry you today.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to love you
steadily when things get hard, and that my commitment today will not be swayed.
<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to laugh
with you, to cry with you, and to be faithful to you until we are parted by
death; to put your needs ahead of my own, and to treat you with honor and
respect. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to do my
best to love you and submit to you as the Church submits to the headship of
Christ, to show you grace as he has shown me grace, and to seek your good in
all things regardless of my circumstances or feelings. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I promise to allow God
to use you in my life as He grows me into a woman of noble character, adorned
with good works. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And so, no matter what
may lie ahead of us, I pledge to you my life as an obedient and faithful wife.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When we said these vows originally, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">we had no idea what our “future circumstances” would look like</b>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the bliss of our wedding day, we were not
thinking of the hardships that we would face just three months down the
road…not considering the fact that many of the hopes and dreams for our future
together would be dramatically shifted while we were still just newlyweds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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We wanted to travel freely and easily. We wanted to live a
fast-paced life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We wanted to be the
perfect, beautiful, happy family that had it all together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">But that’s not what
tomorrow brought.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Although our life is not even close to what we though laid ahead
of us when said our vows, we have been continually reminded this year hat the
Lord has a plan…that He wills certain things to happen or not happen, and He
uses these circumstances to mold and shape us into disciples who bring glory to
Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We are reminded that <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">our
lives are a “mist”…our marriage is a “mist”</b>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If we are not rooted in Christ, all of this
is worthless.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our vows are even more beautiful to me today than they were
on the day of our wedding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They have
context.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They have experienced
fire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are deeper…more real…more raw.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">The Lord has been
good and faithful in producing beauty from our “tomorrow”</b>; and I have no
doubt that He will continue to lead our marriage according to His perfect will
for as many days as He gives us together. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c0504d; mso-themecolor: accent2;">“…yet you do not know what
tomorrow will bring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is your
life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For you are a mist that appears
for a little time and then vanishes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Instead you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will do this or that.’”
</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>James 4:14-15</i><br />
<i><br /></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"></i>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbd3oRmCR3CUdXINHGPlnpGI3hU4mA9-Y1uvYtGsx6QuU70bjjBOh_vmNcg08ivSe6ryJuaSQTv4xID17pPpxCK9tK1z9yp54UvdNEXdzW4OsmHQ0QtKo_osA2RLxi6uxBGKLXFocMTWm0/s1600/Vow+renewal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbd3oRmCR3CUdXINHGPlnpGI3hU4mA9-Y1uvYtGsx6QuU70bjjBOh_vmNcg08ivSe6ryJuaSQTv4xID17pPpxCK9tK1z9yp54UvdNEXdzW4OsmHQ0QtKo_osA2RLxi6uxBGKLXFocMTWm0/s1600/Vow+renewal.jpg" width="640" /></a></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">A huge thanks to Leah McEachern Photography. http://leahmceachernphotography.com/</i></div>
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #c0504d; mso-themecolor: accent2;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
</div>
Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-89231512609560332892014-07-18T21:03:00.005-06:002014-07-18T21:03:51.064-06:00Pruning<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
I spent much of today pruning my garden and meditating on
what it says about “pruning” in the Bible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Although it sounds silly…I tried to put myself in the perspective of the
plant being pruned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If I saw some crazy lady in a wheelchair with her gardening
gloves and shears coming for me, I would be scared and confused.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why is she cutting parts of me off?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why do they need to be removed?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel fine! Look, I have other buds and
flowers blooming!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although I’m sure it
isn’t, I wondered if having branches and old buds cut off is “painful” for a
plant. Ouch, don’t cut there!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I liked
that limb!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For the record…I have never denied being a crazy lady in a
wheelchair…and I suppose “thinking like a plant” ups the craziness even more <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But this whole experience really made me
think.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where is the LORD pruning my
life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is the purpose and the
product of this pruning? The thoughts that came were beautiful…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I went back to Camp Barnabas this summer as a leader with the
Greenwood Community Church youth group trip. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although I went to camp as a volunteer in high
school, I had never been in a wheelchair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>For those who don’t know…Camp Barnabas is a camp devoted to campers that
have disabilities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each camper is paired
up with a volunteer counselor (like the ones we took from GCC) who becomes
their caretaker and their friend for the week. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At camp, I was given the opportunity to speak at a
wrap-up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wrap-up is what we do every
night before bed at camp.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The entire
camp is present and hears a quick 5-7 minute talk on whatever topic the speaker
chooses. The LORD put on my heart to talk about heaven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After I spoke…one of the cabin staff came over and asked me
if I would go and talk with a camper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
think Watson is about 8 years old and he has cerebral palsy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Apparently during my talk he started crying
and refused to move his wheelchair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
does not communicate verbally but knows what is going on around him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I wheeled up, Watson was crying and looking all around
and his counselor (a 16 year old boy volunteer) was just weeping and hugging
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He kept saying, “I wish I could
make this go away…I wish I could make this better for you”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I had no idea what I was supposed to say to make things
better for Watson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I touched his little
hand and told him that he was special, beautiful, cherished, and purposefully
created.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He continued to cry and look around the room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I told him that whether or not he knew it, he was changing
lives…even in that moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Watson’s
counselor will be forever changed from having known him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Still, Watson continued to cry and look around
frantically.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I touched his hand again and told him one last thing, “ I
cannot wait to talk with you and dance with you in heaven…”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In that moment Watson made direct eye contact with me, stopped
crying, and started beaming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His tears
turned to smiles in an instant, and at that he drove his wheelchair away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What fruit is that!! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The LORD prunes our lives that they may bear MORE
fruit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think of my experiences this
summer and cannot deny that the pruning the LORD has done in my life this past
year has truly led to the production of a vast array of fruit.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Recognizing what parts of our life are already bearing
fruit, the LORD prunes them so that they mare produce more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew that I already had a gift when it came
to working with kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I was
injured, I wondered if my ability to work with kids would be negatively
impacted. But maybe the accident was just pruning. Maybe that branch of working
with kids was pruned so that it could bear more fruit…a different kind of
fruit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wheeling up to Watson was different than walking up to
Watson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wheeling up to anyone with a
disability is different than walking up to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What fruit has the LORD already produced from
that!? And what fruit will He continue to produce from it!?! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Whatever changes happen in my life, I have complete faith in
my vinedresser.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Changes may indicate the
pruning process, but I have to believe that the LORD is removing those vines
that do not bear fruit, and pruning those that do so that MORE FRUIT may be
harvested.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Praise Him for His infinite
wisdom and scope of understanding; and for His vision to produce a vibrantly
beautiful garden from all of our lives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><span style="background: white; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #666666; padding: 0in;">1</span></b><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #444444; padding: 0in;"> </span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #cc0000; padding: 0in;">“I am the true vine, and my Father is the
vinedresser. </span><b><span style="background: white; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #666666; padding: 0in;">2 </span></b><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #cc0000; padding: 0in;">Every branch
in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does
bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.</span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #444444; padding: 0in;"> John 15:1-2</span></span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-81737453494310977662014-07-08T14:34:00.002-06:002014-07-08T14:34:35.500-06:00Better late than never...thoughts from the end of the school year<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Friends
and family, <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">I have felt so convicted
over the past few weeks about not blogging.
The Lord is doing incredible things through the story He is writing with
my life, and it is selfish of me not to share them. I have a lots of things I want to blog about
in the next month or so including: the
remodel of our home, our vow-renewal, our trip to Camp Barnabas, my re-evaluation at Craig
hospital, my trip to Florida to visit family, and other thoughts that the Lord
has put on my heart as I transition from "recovering" to "real-life living". <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">All of the above ideas
are in the works in my brain; but below is a blog that I wrote towards the end
of the school year. I never posted it…but
I figured “better late than never”! So
here it is. Thank you for being patient
with me. Look for more frequent posts in
the coming weeks! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Before
I get inside the building at my job in the morning, I have done an hour or so
of necessary bodily preparations, dressed myself in my chair, gathered my
supplies for the day, completed five chair transfers, broken my chair down into
five pieces and loaded it into my car, pulled those pieces back out of my car
and reassembled them, and wheeled up a hill and ramp into the chaos that is
high school. My arms hurt, my shoulders are tired, my hands are covered
in grease and dirt from my wheelchair...and yes, I'm finally ready to start my
five hours with my 95 fourteen year olds. These are the first three hours
of my day, and the physical pulls on my body only continue.</span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Struggle is a common theme on
this blog. And not only here...I'd say it's a common theme in life in general.
Whether in our life or in the lives of those around us, it seems there is
always something difficult...and naturally, we don't like it. </span></b><b><span style="color: black; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;"> Our
natural desire is to be comfortable...and believe me, comfort is one of my
greatest idols. I assume that all comfortable things are good, and I seek those
things above God and His will for my life. But these past six months have
been different. My life is full of physical discomfort and struggle from the
moment I get out of bed until I close my eyes at night. I am fully drained, yet
somehow still full.</span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">When i
think about it, I am floored by the way The Lord has used struggle and hardship
to change and grow me over the past six months. It has been painful and
very uncomfortable, but I am not who I was on September 1. I am
deeper. I am more thoughtful. I am wiser. I am more subtly vibrant. I am
more compassionate. More importantly, I am more insanely captivated by
The Lord and his power and workings. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">The
path I am on now is so dramatically different than anything I ever would have
chosen or written for my own life. I would never have "chosen"
to be paralyzed. I would never have "chosen" to have my husband
diagnosed with diabetes. And all this just three months after our
wedding? No way...not even on my radar. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">These
things are struggles, and I don't think I know anyone that chooses them for
their own life. Never did I ever think that The Lord would shape my heart
in such a way that I could view these struggles and hardships as something
good...something ordained by God.</span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">But in
all reality, The Lord chooses hardship for our lives. The bible instructs
us to view affliction as God desiring to have us as his own...to not cut us
off. We are called to praise him for his patience in refining us instead of
giving us the wrath we deserve....even if it hurts. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">In my
mind, the struggles in my life now show me that The Lord is writing my
story...that He is dictating my path. I am living a life that I would never
have written for myself...but in my heart I know that it is better than what I
would have written. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">Is it
difficult? Yes. Do I always enjoy it? No. But it is an adventure. An adventure
that The Lord has chosen for me. He is undoubtedly the author of my crazy
life...and I have come to the point where I would rather live a difficult life
with him at the helm than an easy life with me as the captain. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">My
suffering and discomfort is from The Lord. He is my rock to lean on, and I use
Him. I couldn't do this life if I didn't. My strong arms, calloused hands, and
quickly shrinking legs are His. Through the daily struggles they remind me that
He is King over my life, and though I am fully tired, that thought makes me
fully full. </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;">"For
my own name's sake I delay my wrath; for the sake of my praise I hold it back
from you, so as to not cut you off. See I have refined you, though not as
silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction. For my own sake,
for my own sake, I do this. How can I let myself be defamed? I will not yield
my glory to another." Isaiah 48:9-11</span></b><b><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b style="font-size: small;"><br /></b></div>
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<b style="font-size: small;">--Kaitlin--</b></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
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Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-75432709747623277602014-03-18T10:33:00.005-06:002014-03-18T10:33:59.804-06:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br />
Thump... thump. Thump... thump. This morning as my alarm buzzed after a third round of snoozing, I came to my senses quickly when I heard a strange thumping sound.<br />
<br />
"What is that?"<br />
<br />
Kaitlin just mumbled groggily - typical. Waking up in the morning is not a particular talent of hers. Like a dutiful husband, I hopped out of bed to go explore the strange noise without bothering to put on pants. Step, step... my bare feet plod down the six stairs, through the construction-zone that is our half formed kitchen - and gingerly I stand on my tip toes to look out the tiny window on our back door.<br />
<br />
Wind. Well, that and the bookshelf-like "candy rock garden" that I took out from our entry way the other day (dubbed "candy rock garden" because this little half wall was filled with white rock as some sort of decorative flair - we filled it with candy because we thought it was ugly... and hilarious). I had set this 1950's antique on the back porch, and the wind was gusting strong enough to tip it over into the wall, making the gentle thumping sound I had heard upstairs. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSNrBrodPs4eI90qKy1VtibBPULch61jQxE8gIH7SfNgq9ToWIYhsKxcwV2fBNjEdg3_kho4yXNZof5EZu_fcNSsTKycQdBMIAZo4tfQWuN4Rk4H6sVrDQsW3Fn6OaVD0x9LjW4yhq-szY/s1600/Rock+candy+garden.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSNrBrodPs4eI90qKy1VtibBPULch61jQxE8gIH7SfNgq9ToWIYhsKxcwV2fBNjEdg3_kho4yXNZof5EZu_fcNSsTKycQdBMIAZo4tfQWuN4Rk4H6sVrDQsW3Fn6OaVD0x9LjW4yhq-szY/s1600/Rock+candy+garden.jpg" height="238" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Oh well, time for another day. It feels good to say that. For so long, Kaitlin and I have been living in a state of constant change. We have moved ourselves and family members into and out of our house almost a dozen times in the past year, and we crave normality and routine. During the past month, we took out our old kitchen, which is gradually being reconstructed into a more open, handicapped accessible area. In the midst of this latest project, we are tired. We are ready to be done, ready to have a home, ready to be "normal." There are certain aspects of our life from which we will never get a break - but luckily construction is not one of them. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxbqqn7IBvMKo2bGXb3fgYjnV_gKyQxFueacxq7SKIV9UU90G1lkjmnwJ1n8z9DWMbG71flSB4YIMYnLzFHgizkkrE8Xuaxj2f9cJy_RHHsU3nnrV0HiRjpqntoreo1YIcwwYYNGjkdOsa/s1600/Demo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxbqqn7IBvMKo2bGXb3fgYjnV_gKyQxFueacxq7SKIV9UU90G1lkjmnwJ1n8z9DWMbG71flSB4YIMYnLzFHgizkkrE8Xuaxj2f9cJy_RHHsU3nnrV0HiRjpqntoreo1YIcwwYYNGjkdOsa/s1600/Demo.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I head back upstairs, test my blood sugar, and give myself a shot - that is new. Then I help Kaitlin swing her legs out of bed and she transfers herself into her chair - that is new. We walk-and-roll over to our lovely bathroom (also new), that was paid for by the kindness of our loving community, and begin the day. <br />
<br />
Even though so much has changed for us, I don't think we are alone in feeling like we don't truly have a "place" here. Over the past month so many friends and family have been going through difficult, heavy stuff. It seems like it never ends. Kaitlin said to me the other day - "I just want a break from being paralyzed..." but there is no rest. <br />
<br />
After my shower I sat looking out the back window at the blustering flurries in our backyard, reading my Bible. In Matthew 11:28 Jesus says "come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." That is all I want... rest. But it can't just stop there, with some coffee-cup Christian-ese statement about coming to Jesus. Later on, Jesus goes on to say "I tell you, something greater than the temple is here. And if you had known what this means, I desire mercy, and not sacrifice, you would not have condemned the guiltless. For the Son of Man is Lord of the Sabbath." In this moment, when I need rest - it comes from an acknowledgement of authority, not from the reduction of my to-do list. God controls my life. I do not need to perform well for him, because I am forgiven through Jesus, and through his sacrifice God delights in me, regardless of my "success" in life. <br />
<br />
Perhaps we don't feel like we are home because we will never feel that way on this earth. There is always another thing to do, something new to accomplish, and plenty of reasons why our lives feel out of control. This week I am working to understand what it means to heed God's authority... and for his grace and mercy to provide me rest. <br />
<br />
- John</div>
Kaitlin Wanberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12785850233515189416noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-24285180457596913582014-01-29T22:24:00.001-07:002014-01-29T22:24:19.389-07:00Back to Work! {A post by Kait}<div class="MsoNormal">
Many of you know that I went back to work last week. Being
in the classroom with my kids again is a huge blessing. They are some of the
sweetest and most understanding people I have ever met, and they are only 14! I
teach 3 periods per day instead of the 5 that I was teaching at the beginning
of the year, and I don’t need to arrive at work until about 10am which has made
my mornings manageable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Through returning to work, the Lord has continued to teach
me more and more about the incredible scope of His wisdom and knowledge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seems He has been orchestrating my
work situation for almost a year, working to open and close doors and to lead
me where He wants me. Whenever I’ve been confused or frustrated or nervous
about work, He has been in control.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has led me here, and I am consistently getting glimpses of the fact
that his purpose and plan is unimaginably greater than my own understanding. </div>
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<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
I am blessed to be back at work, and I look forward to the
Lord’s creativity being revealed as I continue to pursue this career.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you for all of your love,
prayers, and support.<a href="" name="_GoBack"></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Love,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kaitlin</div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-7599272984839232382014-01-20T11:47:00.002-07:002014-01-20T11:47:30.709-07:00Fundraiser FULL!Thank you all so very much for your reservations & willingness to join us for such a special evening benefiting John & Kaitlin. I am so excited to announce that our reservations are completely full!<br />
<br />
Once again, stay tuned for this fundraiser again in another couple of months!<br />
<br />
All my love,<br />
CarolynCarolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-18132518720940963832014-01-15T07:24:00.002-07:002014-01-15T07:24:29.822-07:00Only 5 seats left! <span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Friends & Family-</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you'd still like a spot at the Amerigo fundraiser on Sunday, January 26th--e-mail me as soon as possible!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have 4 seats open for the 5-7 seating and 1 seat open for the 7:30-9 seating. $50 a plate (not including tax). ALL proceeds go to John & Kaitlin directly!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am once again amazed at how quickly we have filled up the reservations. We are literally surrounded by the most generous people in the world. THANK YOU!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All my love-</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Carolyn </span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAOrPSMzCNwNdfxwoOYeD_LU9Vy0eEWlJBHjerSv8ueM3OJcFw1V_D8wgqTyxlHPDdgrzM421EqYGHm8Qzxey8tGuAozt8V_mKS3Cq-N6ZGoxUrYMUDXW5L300JDRSwVtQ0i5ckNtumOZc/s1600/amerigo+%232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAOrPSMzCNwNdfxwoOYeD_LU9Vy0eEWlJBHjerSv8ueM3OJcFw1V_D8wgqTyxlHPDdgrzM421EqYGHm8Qzxey8tGuAozt8V_mKS3Cq-N6ZGoxUrYMUDXW5L300JDRSwVtQ0i5ckNtumOZc/s640/amerigo+%232.jpg" width="452" /></a></div>
<br />Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-91205088877252318992014-01-12T13:42:00.000-07:002014-01-12T13:42:09.731-07:00Healing {A post by Kaitlin}<div>
John and I were recently prayed over by a pastor who has been given
the gift of healing. He has traveled the world and allowed The Lord to
work miracles through this gift. Blind eyes have seen, crippled legs
have walked, deaf ears have heard...and much much more. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Our
meeting with him was casual and comfortable. It felt very Spirit-led as
he prayed for healing in each of our bodies. He asked for my legs to
work again...for Johns pancreas to regain function...even for the metal
in my back to be dissolved. Crazy? Not according to the Bible. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Scripture
is full of miraculous healings performed by Jesus as well as his
followers. If we are followers of Jesus, what restricts us from being
blessed through the Spirit with this ability? </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Since
the prayer session, John and I have continued to pray into the healing
process. No, I did not just stand up and walk out of my wheelchair...no,
John didn't feel his pancreas kick in and take action immediately.
Although it can work that way, healing can also take time and patience. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And
really when I think about it, healing can take so many different forms.
When physical ailments are at the forefront, that's what we ask God to
heal. But is that really what needs healing the most? </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
In
scripture The Lord often announces healing by saying " your sins are
forgiven". Internal healing of our souls and hearts through an
understanding of forgiveness and grace seems to be what is most
important in the Lord's eyes. Outward healing of ailments shows his
power and glory to the earth...but inward healing is of great value as
well.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
In this season, we want to trust that The
Lord is healing John and I according to his will. Whether inward,
outward, or both...God is taking care of us and healing what needs it
most. So if I don't walk, or if John's pancreas still doesn't work, we
are still in the hands of a great God who is binding up our hearts and
souls as we learn how to live this new kind of life.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We
serve and give glory to the ultimate healer. Please pray that his will
would be continually carried out in John and my body and soul so that He
is glorified above all. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255,255,255,0);"><span style="font-size: 15px;"><b>"</b></span><span><i>And behold, some people brought to him a paralytic, lying on a bed. And when Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, '</i><span><i>Take heart, my son; your sins are forgiven</i>.'" Matt 9:2</span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255,255,255,0);"><span><span> </span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255,255,255,0);"><span><span>Love, </span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255,255,255,0);"><span><span>Kaitlin </span></span></span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-46784183409776720322014-01-08T12:36:00.001-07:002014-01-08T12:36:04.284-07:00Amerigo Fundraiser Round 2!We would be honored if you would consider joining our family at our very favorite restaurant at the end of this month to raise support that will continue to help John & Kaitlin with their long term needs. The generosity we have experienced from you all in the last 4 months has been absolutely surreal...we are BEYOND thankful! Thank you for keeping our spirits high & our faith strong. We are so excited to be with you again on January 26th! Please know that even if you attended the last dinner, you are welcome again! We appreciate any & all support.<br />
<br />
E-mail carolynwanberg@gmail.com as soon as possible for your RSVP! Please include your preference (if you have one) of who you'd like to sit with...I will be assigning tables before the event in order to help things run smoothly.<br />
<br />
All my love,<br />
Carolyn<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcqJVjMsPXvg3P4KEYsfbTG9In2hThBpyc7cLRfX9Ea8Jj7qHzKOqnba3KewiaUbEIO6rDcXllmEtedJItWHbG_S4hHv_wJ2IWBpQ9wYIJ3XrDb_HY8Try5_nKZ4uDTSmVC0-gMjni-F59/s1600/amerigo+%232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcqJVjMsPXvg3P4KEYsfbTG9In2hThBpyc7cLRfX9Ea8Jj7qHzKOqnba3KewiaUbEIO6rDcXllmEtedJItWHbG_S4hHv_wJ2IWBpQ9wYIJ3XrDb_HY8Try5_nKZ4uDTSmVC0-gMjni-F59/s1600/amerigo+%232.jpg" height="640" width="455" /></a></div>
<br />Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-26649982525075603232014-01-04T19:06:00.002-07:002014-01-12T13:40:19.398-07:00Practicing the Present Tense<div class="MsoNormal">
My friend Josh put into words what our family has been
trying to do- practicing the present tense. Cognitively it’s so easy to say that I’m
not going to dwell in the past or fixate on the future, but then I try to put
it into my daily routine and I realize it is a much harder task. Yet I know
that life can be so amazing when I live the short game, enjoy<a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=4187639194159946680" name="_GoBack"></a>
the moment, be present now, and see the joy at hand. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Our puppy Jax is the master of the short game, of living in
the moment. One of my favorite times of the day revolves around letting him out
of his kennel in the laundry room first thing in the morning. As he hears my
steps approaching his tail begins thumping with anticipation. As his gate
swings open he runs circles around my legs with total and complete joy. As he
bolts into the backyard his ears flapping and feet flying he circles the yard sniffing
for rabbits and squirrels. Jax loves life; every moment is in the now, no
seeming memory of the past or fear of the future- just pure living in the moment at
hand.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
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As I ponder my faith journey in over the last four months, it
seems like my ability to live in the moment with peace and joy is entirely
dependent on my ability to accept by faith that God is in control, and that He
has my best interest at heart. Do I really believe what the Bible says and can
I apply it in my life? Hebrews 13:5 says “…Never will I leave you; never will I
forsake you” – then continues in verse 15 with “Through Jesus, therefore, let
us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise- the fruit of lips that
confess his name.”<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-T9jD4Awi430qaojEM6GHqJypbZk_VdYki3oCrjmIhBo65B17gys9QeY1QoiYSak523kNr2SmEXbflyaqv-nvT_ucVAl-JDRgaGo0EAQSFs_6ZQP6OFau1eZnuH2mY_nehSFXmIwCtIHu/s1600/IMG_6999.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-T9jD4Awi430qaojEM6GHqJypbZk_VdYki3oCrjmIhBo65B17gys9QeY1QoiYSak523kNr2SmEXbflyaqv-nvT_ucVAl-JDRgaGo0EAQSFs_6ZQP6OFau1eZnuH2mY_nehSFXmIwCtIHu/s400/IMG_6999.JPG" height="335" width="400" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There really is no partial surrender to the Lord in a time of
testing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Happy New Year from our family to yours-</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tom</div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-16314993364436287492013-12-27T14:39:00.001-07:002013-12-27T14:39:05.744-07:00Boxing Day<div class="MsoNormal">
It has been a strange Christmas season at the Wanberg
household…. Kait and I were figuring out what Christmas looked like as our own
family while simultaneously unpacking boxes, planning for the kitchen
renovations, and adjusting to life back home. We have shed our fair share of tears as we remember the
months we had in the house with Kaitlin walking, and have laughed heartily as
we build new memories and struggle through the adjustments. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last Sunday Kaitlin and I were cooking lunch at home; it was
nothing special, just a frozen pizza.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Set your timer for 12 minutes Bobby Flay, no skill needed to make this
meal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>11 minutes into the cooking
time, our oven started smoking furiously due to some gunk which had accumulated
in the bottom pan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We opened the
door and fanned it out, but the smoke just kept coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Naturally, I decided we could get a
more airtight seal out of the oven door if we locked it, so I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At this point I need to pause and say
that Kaitlin was hungry… not just “I could eat” sort of hungry… more like “FEED
ME OR DIE” hungry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can imagine
my terror when I discovered that our oven door locked smoothly… and then
refused to unlock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I begged, I
pleaded, I hauled on the stupid little latch thing, all to no avail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“GET THE PIZZA!” my wife yelled, to
which I responded “WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO!??!?!?!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>IT IS LOCKED!” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As we bantered back and forth with each other I tried to
explain to my hungry wife that I was really on her team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also wanted the pizza to be out of
the oven, but could not see a solution short of getting out my power tools and
cutting a hole in the oven door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>At this point all we had was the faint oven light, revealing to us that
our pizza was being baked into a crispy little black hockey puck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kaitlin wanted to call 911 – I said no
and got out the tools.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fifteen
minutes later we had removed the still hot cook-top to get at the locking
mechanism, which I cut off… no machine bests John Wanberg and lives. The pizza looked terrible, but we ate
it anyways. We are still laughing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The past few weeks have been very difficult.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have been noticeably delinquent in
posting on the blog and communicating with those close to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even so, I want to let you all know
that we cannot even express how loved and supported we feel in the midst of our
exhaustion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The outpouring of
gifts, money, kind notes, well wishes, and friends willing to listen and grieve
with us continues to amaze us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Life without this support would be dark indeed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
We cling to the truth of the gospel for strength.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When it feels like we can’t do it, we
remember Jesus – who being in very nature God, still humbled himself to the
point of death on a cross (Philippians chapter 2).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the days in which we are close to despair, we try to
remember how God has used you all to provide for us, and ask him to give us
just enough strength, and a little bit of laughter along the way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Love,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">John</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQBdTjb22uUv9UNSC9B0HJEks3tLBUaKKjPQnWKAFVVDKSjvsx99yKvrJMsAsYaRCCwgjdtaVMd_Zurovx74byD7XQTQmUl0T8FswVkec5q21d7tvwcVH3sKM0kcX5m9HSxrPWrCgZnXVV/s1600/john.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQBdTjb22uUv9UNSC9B0HJEks3tLBUaKKjPQnWKAFVVDKSjvsx99yKvrJMsAsYaRCCwgjdtaVMd_Zurovx74byD7XQTQmUl0T8FswVkec5q21d7tvwcVH3sKM0kcX5m9HSxrPWrCgZnXVV/s640/john.png" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-46711921362213089182013-12-09T08:04:00.001-07:002013-12-09T12:29:09.354-07:00Preparing a Place<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Jesus told His disciples, “I am going ahead
of you to my Father’s house which has many rooms. There I will prepare a place
for you<i>” John 14:2</i> Although we all believe that Jesus was
referring to heaven when he made this statement, I must admit that I am reminded
of it each time I enter Kaitlin and John’s newly renovated home. The community
which has come together to make it happen has been so inspiring and humbling: packing
and emptying the house, demolition, sanding, moving the shed, leveling dirt,
laying concrete, countless lunches for work crews, tiling, electric, grouting,
refinishing floors, painting, cleaning, mopping, dusting, assembling closet
storage units, loading, unpacking, and finally reaching the ‘move in’ day! What
a fast and incredible journey this has been.
It could not have happened without your generous financial donations and
the volunteers who sacrificed their time and energy to the effort. It feels as
if the Lord has had His hand in gathering together a community of workers to
serve and help prepare this home for Kaitlin and John; a home which will
undoubtedly be a true blessing to them for years to come. We are grateful
beyond words.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">During the past 10 weeks the upstairs of
the house has been transformed from the original 2 bedrooms and small bath to a
larger master bedroom, laundry room with front loading washer and dryer, and an
enormous, totally accessible bathroom featuring a roll-in shower, his and her
sinks (hers with a higher clearance to accommodate the wheelchair), make-up area,
accessible bathtub, plenty of storage, natural lighting and beautiful
cabinetry. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Frank, our lead contractor and Mark’s
long-time friend/CU fraternity brother, graciously offered his services to supervise
the project. We feel very indebted to Frank and his hard working crew of subcontractors
who have approached this very special construction project with a sense of heartfelt
purpose. Frank told us from the start that his objective was to make this home
such a great place for John and Kaitlin that they would never want to leave it.
Seeing it, we’re certain that will be the case.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">A lift, which will help Kaitlin go up the
six stairs between the main level and the upstairs, has been provided by Home
Builders Assoc (a non-profit specializing in accessibility). Although the
kitchen still needs renovation, it is functional and usable and is another
project which will begin sometime in mid February.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">In addition to the inside changes, a large
detached garage has been built in the backyard complete with new wider
sidewalks and porches which allow Kaitlin direct access from the garage to the
house with no stairs to negotiate.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">This home will be a place where Kaitlin can
feel comfortable and independent. We are so thankful to everyone who helped to
make it possible. Thank you, Lord for preparing this house for John & Kaitlin. </span><br />
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-GB">Pictures to come soon!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<u><span lang="EN-GB">PRAYER REQUESTS <o:p></o:p></span></u></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Please continue praying for complete and
total healing so that Kaitlin may walk again</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Protection from flu and respiratory viruses</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Effective physical therapy as Kaitlin adjusts to
having had her back brace removed.</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Gentle transition back home for both
Kaitlin and John</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Softened hearts as we all make our way
through the grieving process</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">The Lord to help us through our loss and
sadness and bring us ultimately to a place of healing and acceptance</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Love, Sue </span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-82782806331669047422013-11-30T13:10:00.001-07:002013-11-30T13:10:35.399-07:00Me or Him?As most weeks have been in this season, this past week has been a mixture of wonderful & challenging. I have come to a realization recently that has brought a certain amount of freedom to my soul when I am sitting in the midst of the chaos: it's either about me, or it's about God. What I mean by that is quite simple-and yet somehow, evokes a daily war within. When people say, "God doesn't give you anything you can't handle-you must be incredibly strong"-I think most times they say that to encourage me & my character and while well received...it doesn't make much sense to me these days. <div>
<br /></div>
<div>
You see, I don't believe that God puts something on our plate with the intention of pushing us to the end of our rope, just to see how much we can handle. I also don't believe that it's about what I can handle or can't handle. To me, it seems to make much more sense to just trust that whatever happens on this earth, I have the God of the universe on my side. He will never leave me or forsake me. He walks with me through whatever comes up. The realization is: it's about Him. It's about His consistency & faithfulness. He is sovereign over every ounce of what happens during my lifetime--and he works all things together for His glory. It's not really about me, about my family or about our circumstances. It's really about the plan that he has for our lives and for the lives around us. I find that I'm quick to analyze the things happening around me & my family and wonder things like-when will it end? when will our luck change? when will things be easier or comfortable again? so many hard things have happened in the last couple months to John & Kait...they are bound to have something good happen, right?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Actually....wrong. Do I hope that this season is followed by a season of abundance & joy & comfort for my family? Absolutely. Do I believe that we deserve that, or that somehow our "luck" is about to change? Not really. Who knows? Reality is, we could have this season of endless challenges last the rest of our lives. Frankly, I don't think it's even about that at all. My deepest prayer in this moment is that our family is a family who believes with the deepest longings of our souls that what goes on in this life, is about the God of the universe-and not about us. Would you pray this over us in this time?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This week John & Kait + the rest of the Wanberg's & Daniel and I were fortunate enough to attend a dear friend's wedding (pictures below-congrats again to Sue & Tom! We love you!) and celebrate Thanksgiving together at the Rice's house. Both were joyous celebrations of life & the immense blessings the Lord has poured upon us. We sat around the table on Thanksgiving evening after a long walk together around the neighborhood & shared what we are most thankful for. Craig & the incredible staff that took care of Kaitlin, a family who is united when it would be so easy to be enveloped by stress & turn against one another, a community who is not afraid of our burdens-but gladly bears them with us. We are thankful for warm meals that were intentionally thought out and delivered, for Kaitlin's life and for Kait & John's marriage. We are thankful for warm homes, for the resources that we have been given & blessed with. We are thankful for the life of my sweet Grandma Jeanne & Mark's brother, Dennis. We spoke freely about the joys we have experienced over the last year, and about the hardships that we have fought & are fighting. At the end of our conversation, we ate pie & ice cream, had a family sing-along in the living room and laughed deeply.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We most certainty serve a generous and gracious God. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Prayer requests: </div>
<div>
<ul>
<li>Pray that Kaitlin's panic attacks will go completely away</li>
<li>Pray that getting her brace off on Monday will go smoothly [she is sooooo excited!]</li>
<li>Pray that John & Kait would have a smooth transition into their newly renovated home when they begin to move in in the next couple weeks</li>
<li>Pray for Kait as she goes to visit her students next week & prepares to begin teaching again part time in January</li>
<li>Pray for the complete healing of Kait's spine-that she may walk again!</li>
</ul>
<div>
We appreciate each of you & your commitment to fighting for & walking with us....you are truly treasured by each member of our family.</div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We love you!</div>
<div>
-Carolyn</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCmPuxrxA2RhEnrviDD6R-ZxnanqMM8JjIW5x52zzGfwaiPiMJVj3T1qyBEtEyRzp_tjrwW6IvdJ3rQoD9hdfRXJAVA4PxSpw5QcCYJflADaEdJooQSYBFKO3M10DZBgiKg1uNZnucgus2/s1600/IMG_6551.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCmPuxrxA2RhEnrviDD6R-ZxnanqMM8JjIW5x52zzGfwaiPiMJVj3T1qyBEtEyRzp_tjrwW6IvdJ3rQoD9hdfRXJAVA4PxSpw5QcCYJflADaEdJooQSYBFKO3M10DZBgiKg1uNZnucgus2/s320/IMG_6551.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZg-55xp4xchpXTdL5K_Lq50JhGSzNtaygqlxCnVP3W3q6iJ1o5VHRZUDytfsplevaLGgDdn500uEVbyKxBKQIpK0NnDUK3kcdkUtjq1zBFWY-AAnG9dpvK_Q1Sj8VbHpQAKoYBbWY2DiL/s1600/IMG_6559.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZg-55xp4xchpXTdL5K_Lq50JhGSzNtaygqlxCnVP3W3q6iJ1o5VHRZUDytfsplevaLGgDdn500uEVbyKxBKQIpK0NnDUK3kcdkUtjq1zBFWY-AAnG9dpvK_Q1Sj8VbHpQAKoYBbWY2DiL/s320/IMG_6559.jpg" width="206" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgymxu7RXjt6f-F9ooIKFIjb9mfAH_lEnxGZzKrzlnR4mxcvVqAWY6ZT7EQj8smhnN4moty7Ffre877yx5TvDyZxcF-17zxGIPcPP3bmjoPbXn2FM2cHCiNdL6WqL30GDMaBW4fTyIWQLGa/s1600/IMG_6571.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgymxu7RXjt6f-F9ooIKFIjb9mfAH_lEnxGZzKrzlnR4mxcvVqAWY6ZT7EQj8smhnN4moty7Ffre877yx5TvDyZxcF-17zxGIPcPP3bmjoPbXn2FM2cHCiNdL6WqL30GDMaBW4fTyIWQLGa/s320/IMG_6571.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Almost cute...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzctWerNA3cVO8aXSHnZw83kysJCXdFhUXGHQ1ceziOd_wLCLcNTWTEbZNFVvy0cg3JOx6pYrv5AJatsv080I7_vJqM4ceAQENv_QB3agr8hwyGeqSoVyOGJ8ASQPW8aJv1jf6wh_Y_VWo/s1600/IMG_6585.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzctWerNA3cVO8aXSHnZw83kysJCXdFhUXGHQ1ceziOd_wLCLcNTWTEbZNFVvy0cg3JOx6pYrv5AJatsv080I7_vJqM4ceAQENv_QB3agr8hwyGeqSoVyOGJ8ASQPW8aJv1jf6wh_Y_VWo/s320/IMG_6585.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Wanberg side {minus Daniel who joined us later}</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpZM12J_HMg-RvRFFRoNyjOGAyDPioQ6sS_SdKJeK10BX-NcNndKBPa5sKcIiZoX5ZZNXuxK1Ps8QHoB8QqlnWe7EWGWYjrv9FkRixkp6omhvstWWubAUvVaveFim1EOIQvHJHoWnniX1I/s1600/IMG_6599.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpZM12J_HMg-RvRFFRoNyjOGAyDPioQ6sS_SdKJeK10BX-NcNndKBPa5sKcIiZoX5ZZNXuxK1Ps8QHoB8QqlnWe7EWGWYjrv9FkRixkp6omhvstWWubAUvVaveFim1EOIQvHJHoWnniX1I/s320/IMG_6599.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We were early to the wedding & this is what happened with our extra time...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br /></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-67749375050619562532013-11-27T12:04:00.003-07:002013-11-27T12:04:56.815-07:00Fighting Back with Truth<div class="MsoNormal">
I had a panic attack last night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wish I could say that this was a rarity; but it has
actually been happening quite often since the accident.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Going through a spinal cord injury is
like riding a roller coaster.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some
times are easy and carefree and I hardly notice the wheelchair and
paralysis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Other times are filled
with anxiety and sadness and all I want to do is escape from what feels like a
prison inside my own body.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These
ups and downs are HARD for both John and I.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When everything is going well I feel like myself and we
function fairly normally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I
am feeling down or anxious, however, it is almost as though my brain works completely
differently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I lose hope and want
to give up this crazy fight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
One of the hardest parts of all of it is that I never know
when my anxious moments are going to strike.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They seem to sneak in and take over while my guard is
down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The only thing to do once the
attack as begun is to fight back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Despite this knowledge, w</span>hen I am down, fighting back is the last thing I want to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last night during the panic attack, we parked my wheelchair
on the front porch and John sat by my side while I cried and cried and tried to
catch my breath.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He didn’t say
much, knowing that nothing he said could cure or take away this attack.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What he did say, however, was powerful.
He asked me to remember what I know to be TRUE about God, Jesus, myself, and
the relationship between the three.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">God is GOOD</b> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Psalm 86:5)</i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">God created us and LOVES us deeply <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Genesis 1:27) (Psalm 139:13-16) (Ephesians 2:4-5)<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">God is SOVEREIGN (meaning he has complete control over the entire
universe) <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Psalm 139:1-4)<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">God NEVER CHANGES, even when things in our life feel out of control <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Hebrews 13:8)<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">God makes all things work together for our good </b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Romans 8:28)</i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jesus is the SON of God</b> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Joh<a href="" name="_GoBack"></a>n 3:16)</i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jesus DIED AND ROSE again to take away our sins <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(1 John 4:9-10) (Ephesians 2:1-10)<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jesus’ death gives us HOPE that we will be united with God someday<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(John 3:16) (Ephesians
2:1-10)<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">NOTHING can separate us from the LOVE of GOD</b> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Romans 8:38-39)</i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">We are like DUST or a WHISPER</b> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Psalm
103:13-16)</i></div>
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We have a God who has <u style="text-underline: thick;">already
won</u> the battle and has left us with TRUTHS about himself and us that fight
harder than we ever could alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When I feel anxious, the only thing I can do it meditate on these truths
and keep them at the front of my mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The lies, anxiety, and hopelessness seem so overpowering sometimes, but
God has given me tools to fight with if I am willing to use them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Love,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Kaitlin</span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-55733167021703269012013-11-19T09:30:00.001-07:002013-11-19T09:30:28.470-07:00The Bread of Life<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">In John chapter 6 Jesus accuses his followers of seeking Him not to hear his message, but simply because he gave them bread to eat and made sure their stomachs were full. He basically said that the only reason they wanted to have anything to do with him was because he solved one of their worldly problems which was hunger. Although they denied it, I think that for many of the followers, Jesus' accusation was accurate. Why? Because I fight this tendency daily. <br><br>This new life that I face is filled with incredible challenges. I can put on a happy face and pretend that everything is ok, but in reality, I want to be healed so badly. I want to be able to walk and run and hike and dance. I want to be able to get dressed or go to the bathroom like a normal person. I could never have fathomed the frustration that stems from this type of an injury. Everything is different...more difficult...and I just want to be normal. <br><br>I ask The Lord every day to heal me, but in reality, he is not a magic genie. Jesus did not come to make every challenge or hardship or struggle go away. He did not come so that my life would be simple or comfortable. His purpose in coming here was to bring glory to himself. If I treat him like a genie and seek Him for the sole purpose of solving my problems, he does not receive glory in my life. If I shift my mindset, however, and realize that by coming here Jesus has given me HOPE and the ability to stand up underneath all of these frustrations even if they are never healed or solved, the result is praise towards him.<br><br>Jesus is not my personal magic genie. Nor would I want Him to be. He is the SON of the GOD of the UNIVERSE. He is the bread of life. He is everything. Eat of His flesh and drink of His blood and we will be saved. He came to save my soul and to give to me the bread of life so that even under the weight of paralysis and all of the frustrations stemming from it, I will be FULL. I will be SAVED. I will have the strength to STAND. <br><br>My response to this will always be praise. What an awesome and eternal God we serve. <br><br></span><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Love, Kaitlin</span></div>Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-341037575906403392013-11-15T18:10:00.001-07:002013-11-15T18:10:24.591-07:00I'm Free! {A post by Kaitlin}<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m Free! I’m
Free!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yesterday we m<a href="" name="_GoBack"></a>oved from Craig hospital into a hotel just a few miles down
the road.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since then we have been
enjoying this “freedom” to the fullest! Our hotel happens to share a parking
lot with Chili’s AND a movie theater; so John and I obviously enjoyed both last
night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today we took a quick visit
to our home in Aurora and then headed up to Boulder!</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What a joy it was to be able to leave my
residence without having to worry about notifying doctors, nurses, pharmacy
techs, etc..<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I won’t say this new
freedom has been free of bumps and bruises; but the JOY I am experiencing to be
living life outside of the hospital’s yoke far outweighs the struggles.</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This new stage
reminds me that freedom isn’t easy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Even freedom in Christ isn’t EASY…no one said it would be, but it is
JOYFUL.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are set FREE to live
life fully by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Seize this freedom that has been given
to us along with the bumps, bruises, hardships, and overwhelming JOY that it
offers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am looking forward
to exploring this new life the Lord has given me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am FREE! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“<i>Who the Son sets
free is free indeed</i>”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Romans 8:36</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Love, Kaitlin</span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-49020565666735147112013-11-14T07:46:00.000-07:002013-11-14T07:46:00.430-07:00Good Shots<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">These pictures are overdue to be posted-Mark, I apologize for the delay in getting them on the blog! </span><div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Kait and her Dad went hunting a few weeks ago and from what I've heard-all the guys on the trip were incredibly impressed with Kaitlin's shot. Once again, she proves how hard-core she is! Our side of the family was in Chicago when John got a text with the first picture (below) in it....he promptly showed it to everyone around us with pride. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Mark writes this about their trip: </span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Here are a few shots from last weekend (pun</i></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;">Intended). It was huge Fun. I would never have</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;">dreamed we would be hunting. Praise God for</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;">healing, and for all the great people he's gifted to</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;">bless us. Mark</span></i></span><div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;"><br /></span></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12.727272033691406px;"><br /></span></i></span></div>
Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-81049294370049428182013-11-14T07:41:00.000-07:002013-11-14T10:11:34.030-07:00TransitionsSweet friends & family-<br>
<br>
Today is the day! Kait is scheduled to transition out of Craig hospital this afternoon. She has completed all of her therapies (incredibly successfully) and checked off on all of her skills. She has completed her driving program, been video taped doing her daily routines by her therapists in order to help future patients- and this morning will be saying the last of her goodbye's (she'll of course be back to visit-so they are really more like "see you later's".)<br>
<br>
Last night as Daniel and I sat with her she looked completely at peace as she said, "I'm ready. It feels natural to be moving on to the next stage of this journey." She is truly a woman after the Lord's heart, and because of this-she is confident in his provision and sovereignty no matter the circumstance. What a blessing it is to spend time with her.<br>
<br>
Our family invites you to pray with us today for John and Kait. May this transition be seamless and natural. May Kaitlin feel proud of her accomplishments, and hopeful when thinking of the accomplishments still to come. May the Lord protect this courageous couple against any ounce of anxiety or fear. May they feel the abundant love of our Creator & be overflowing with the joy of His presence in this season.<br>
<br>
As with any big transition, there are joyful things and difficult things. In this transition, we are choosing to open our eyes to the joyful ones. Would you celebrate with us today? Celebrate the incredible gift of Kaitlin's health. Remembering her the day of the accident brings me to tears as I think about how far she has come to be where she is today. She has learned so much over the past couple months and I am incredibly grateful that she is well enough to leave the hospital. She fought for life and will continue to fight!<br>
<br>
Looking ahead: Today, John & Kait will move into a hotel close to Craig for a week to give them a chance to transition together and to get some much needed time alone. Sometime next week, their plan is to move in with Daniel and I until their house is complete. Kait will pick up her new wheelchair in a week (and get to trade in the wheelchair she's in now, which she hates). She is scheduled to get her brace off around November 25th, which will be a HUGE celebration. She will be returning to teach part time at the beginning of January, and will return to teach full time at the beginning of the new school year in August.<br>
<br>
There is no doubt in my mind that Craig hospital and everyone in it is better because of Kaitlin-she will be missed! There is also no doubt in my mind that the world outside of Craig is so ready to have her back.<br>
<br>
We appreciate you & your prayers--<br>
Stay tuned!<br>
<br>
Carolyn<br>
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P.S. The next Amerigo fundraiser for those interested is in the planning stages-we are shooting for early January to give Iain (owner of Amerigo) time to focus on the busy holiday season! Reservations will be open sometime mid-December. Keep your eyes out for the invitation! Thank you for your support.Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-8457123345286113682013-11-12T20:58:00.002-07:002013-11-12T20:58:57.954-07:00Fear and a Scolding - A Short Post From JohnI can hardly believe it…. Kaitlin gets discharged from Craig in just a few short days. Tonight one of our friends had her hairdresser come by and give Kait a lovely haircut, so as I sit here writing this she is tossing her hair back and forth saying “don’t I look pretty?” Of course she does! She is positively radiant, exuding confidence and excitement that we are about to enter in to the next phase of this journey. I can’t help but grin stupidly as she wheels from side to side admiring herself in the mirror. That is my wife! What a top-notch lady. I am so proud of her. <br /><br />Thinking again of leaving Craig this Thursday, I am excited. What I find however is that my mind continually shifts to the great unknown of our future. Trying to think through life insurance, getting a job this next year, dealing with health insurance and medical bills is overwhelming. Fear begins to well up inside of me. The chance of successfully navigating all of these things seems small in comparison to the obstacles at hand. When I talked through these feelings with Kait, she simply told me to step back and take things one day at a time. I am reminded of the time that Jesus scolded his disciples for their lack of faith when they were worried about what they were going to eat. The God of the universe just grins and looks at me from above saying “don’t you get it? I created everything. Am I not capable of taking care of you?” <br /><br />Yes Lord, you are certainly capable. I believe that you will care for us, but help me with my unbelief. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11891224494378815691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4187639194159946680.post-45635061370725480452013-11-05T20:04:00.000-07:002013-11-05T20:04:29.676-07:00Future GraceI received a text from one of my best friends in the world today- and to me, it was the perfect encouragement for where my heart is right in this moment. I wanted to share it in case it struck a chord in any of you since I feel so strongly that each of you is so deeply invested in our family & are truly walking this path along with us.<br />
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<i>"I'm reading a book called Doctrine Matters by Piper. In the section I am reading he talks about past grace and future grace. Past grace being the cross & the new birth in Christ. He states, 'Christ died for us and lives for us. And because his death is all-purchasing, and his life is all providing, grace will NEVER stop flowing to us. Therefore to trust in past grace means to draw from it confidence in future grace.' Carolyn, praying that as you trust in past grace you would draw confidence in future grace. Thankful that even that trust and faith is by the power and grace of God alone."</i><br />
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Each of your devotion to reading our humble attempts at processing life right now is proof that the Lord we serve protects us & loves us in profoundly beautiful ways. We get to trust in future grace because the truth of the gospel REIGNS. God sent his only son to die on our behalf. Jesus lived the life that we could not live in order to die the death that we deserve to die. The best part? He rose from the dead to give us new life! We get to live in freedom knowing that God the Father sees us through the perfection of His Son. There is no greater gift than the past, present & future grace of the King of all creation.<br />
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I echo Tara's beautiful prayer for me, over all of you-that you would draw confidence in the grace of God.<br />
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All our love-<br />
C<br />
<br />Carolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03577377800519860320noreply@blogger.com0